What to Do if You Know Someone Is Lying

Posted on 31st October, 2021

by Shawna

In connection with a blog post I wrote about cheating, I thought it would be worth writing about lying in a relationship. Is it acceptable dishonesty in a relationship?

I always believed that open and honest communication is one of the primary conditions for a harmonious relationship.

However, telling the truth or lying is a very sensitive issue in relationships. I often hear from my clients that "It's not that my partner cheated, it's the fact that he/she lied, hurts the most." On the other hand, if you tell the truth, you may feel relieved, but you may also cause damage to your relationship as the trust of your partner will be shaken. What to tell and what to keep for ourselves in a relationship? I think for a well-functioning relationship, we should talk honestly and openly about our values, our desires, goals, our commitment, financial issues, about sexual orientation. I firmly believe that we should never keep quiet about aspects that can affect our partner's life.

How to Encourage Your Partner to Be Honest in a Relationship?

Let your partner know you prefer to see the truth regardless of the situation. It is also important when your partner tells you the truth regarding a challenging situation, try to respond calmly instead of reacting emotionally.

There are many reasons partners lie to each other in a relationship:

  • some are afraid of their partner's reaction and lie to avoid a potential conflict
  • others don't want to feel exposed
  • others are afraid of the consequences regarding their relationship

Counseling Can Help You Deal With the Situation

Regardless of the reasons for your partner's dishonesty, lying is toxic behavior that will eventually break down your relationship. Staying in a relationship with a pathological or compulsive liar is highly toxic. I recommend you seek counseling to deal with what's happening in your relationship.

The guidance of an experienced counselor can be valuable in helping partners communicate more effectively and honestly. How to overcome dishonesty in your relationships? During my readings, I often get these questions from my clients. How to deal with our partner's lies and go on full of trust? How to confront my partner? There's no simple answer to these questions. When you confront a dishonest person, they often become better at disguising their lies. Another challenging situation is when you find out that one of your friends is lying. How to tell the truth to their partners? How to know if someone is ready or not to find the truth? I offered many readings for couples, and I know how difficult it can be to determine whether to share the truth.